Enjoying the Season I’m In

Autumn is pulling at my heartstrings. I’ve shared this a few times this past week, and I’m currently working on yet another autumnal embroidery piece as we speak, but Summer is finding little ways to remind me “I’m still here! Soak me in!” 

And I’m trying, but the upcoming seasonal change is accompanied by some big decisions we’re making as a family too. It’s hard to live in the moment when my mind is throwing constant “What Ifs?” at me about our future. 

It’s so easy to get lost in the “What Ifs?” and miss the “Right Nows!”. I’ve spent several long nights this week what-iffing myself into exhaustion and then blearily stumbling through the next day only half there. My anxiety about their future is taking away from the mommy I want to be for my children right now, and that isn’t going to work for me anymore. 

The future is coming, and change will come with it, whether I want it to or not, and whether I stress myself sick about it or not. Knowing that isn’t magically going to make me stop worrying, but reminding myself that my current rate of survival is 100% has me feeling somewhat optimistic. 

There are scary unknowns in front of us, but there are some pretty fun knowns too! Pumpkin Spice and Pink Drink Tuesdays. Halloween and changing leaves. A very special girl’s 5th birthday and our 2nd Annual Gordon Family Friendsgiving. And before any of that we still have some pool days, a surprise 8th birthday camping trip, first days of 5th, 3rd, and Pre-K, and fresh berries for breakfast!